JR's Campaign Questions Answered-

JR over at JR's blog had this set of questions one was to know a few of the answers to before throwing together a new campaign. I thought I would oblige them, and so I have gotten a few locals to answer J's questions:

1. What is the deal with my cleric's religion? --If you worship some particular god, don't be surprised if someone or something else is supplying part of the power that grants you those miracles. Othern' that, we here revere the Emperor.
2. Where can we go to buy standard equipment? -- Trading post or town Shoppe
3. Where can we go to get platemail custom fitted for this monster I just befriended? -- A local unscrupulous blacksmith, maybe. What do you mean, exactly, by Monster? We don't take kindly to no Humanoids in town, I tell you what.
4. Who is the mightiest wizard in the land? -- Wizard? Oh, that guy who fiddles with Ancient Technology? He lives in that weird old house in the back woods.
5. Who is the greatest warrior in the land? -- Well, Dahl is known to be able to take a ten-point buck with his coilstock, shooting from a tree stand, and Qavor, he once fought a Ousumyn with naught but a knife when it got hold of his youngest. We got lots of men, and a few of the gals, who's killed a few Dokirin raiders or muties in recent years.
6. Who is the richest person in the land? -- Which land? Here? Oh, the Mayor, or Mr. Basqon, maybe.
7. Where can we go to get some magical healing? -- Do you mean medicine? Oh, more than herbs, but less than syringes. Dunno. Do you folks have lots of 'magical healing' where you're from?
8. Where can we go to get cures for the following conditions: poison, disease, curse, level drain, lycanthropy, polymorph, alignment change, death, undeath? -- Lycanthropy is a disease? I think my grandpa had a polymorph, on his back side, once. It was just lanced and set over with a mustard plaster. Alignment change? Oh!, that's what they do to them buggies that don't steer correct, right? Death is just what happens: You gotta deal with that, son. As for Undeath...best not to speak of the dead.
9. Is there a magic guild my MU belongs to or that I can join in order to get more spells? -- You sure do talk a lot about magic. You feelin' okay, mister?
10. Where can I find an alchemist, sage or other expert NPC? -- Paertown is the first place I'd look.
11. Where can I hire mercenaries? -- The Guild Council rents 'em out by the hour, or so I hear.
12. Is there any place on the map where swords are illegal, magic is outlawed or any other notable hassles from Johnny Law? -- Can't righly speak to the magic question (Hey, Bahb, this Tsheff fellah sure is queer for magic, ain't he?) As for swords and the like. It best be a place far from here, I tell you what. If anyone tries takin' my kit away, they best bring an army. An' everyone here feels just the same. Live Vrun or Die.
13. Which way to the nearest tavern? -- We use shingles hung out above the door. See? We got a few, catering to different classes of clientel.
14. What monsters are terrorizing the countryside sufficiently that if I kill them I will become famous? -- Well, tell you what. We seen some Xurosen near Old Man Piters' lodge. You and a few of your tin-plated buddies want to trek up there and take a male, we'll throw you a party. That'll make the news in Romers and Kuaietville...maybe even Luxum.
15. Are there any wars brewing I could go fight? -- Hmm. Well, you look pretty soft there, but...hmmm. Well, get in touch with the local GC rep. Maybe you can carry ammo and such.
16. How about gladiatorial arenas complete with hard-won glory and fabulous cash prizes? -- We's civilised in these here parts, son. Torether may throw a few unfortunate Durnsmen into a pit, if I recall the stories, but nothin' the children ought to see. Humans too rare to waste on blood sport, y'know.
17. Are there any secret societies with sinister agendas I could join and/or fight? -- > blank stare < You with Mal'shevski?
18. What is there to eat around here? -- We got us the best pan-fried breaded Brach this side of the Stemford, I tell you what. You like the brew, too, dont'cha? You look like you like the brew too much. Haw! Li'l Soniahs will set you up for half a Count. Music's good, too.
19. Any legendary lost treasures I could be looking for? -- Hells, the whole place is littered with wot tech we need to get offa this soggy rock. Throw a stone out in the sticks and you're bound to hit some old treasure or doodad.
20. Where is the nearest dragon or other monster with Type H treasure? -- Type 'H'? I an't that learned about nothin' ceptin' Small Unit Repair, and a bit about Ecologies and Apex Predators my folks taught me. > nearing < You did say treasure, right?

Thanks Bahb, Manyx, and Throq.