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Saturday, September 2, 2023

Have's and Have-not's

Have all of my creative energy channeled into writing, AI and physical art, with daily 5 minutes guitar.  I have neglected my guitar chords for a style I haven't found anyone else performing, and it has taken me where I am now on the guitar, which its great, and brings me a little bit of pleasure, sense of control, and accomplishment.

Want to unite what I know about guitar into something seamless, where my chords and this new thing I'm doing, and scales, and ColorMusic's interdependent dynamics blend together emergently, but so far it hasn't hatched.
:: Suggestions for tending breakthroughs?

Haven't touched ARGUS or Auldgory in months.  I look at the character sheet, and although it is what I want, I have no gaming prospects in my future, even online, given my work schedule, and so gaming feels like a vestigial limb.  I daily look at a set of polyhedral dice, and can't even imagine meeting new gamers and dealing with whatever socio-political BS to which they are subscribed on my weekends.
:: Any advice on scratching that itch without a full-blown Solo-campaign; I don't have the room for a board or map with active pieces in play.

Feel stuck in almost every other part of my life -- no way forward.  I've confronted myself about flawed strategies followed, psychological limitations I have placed on myself, but it really just seems like one of those periods where my hands on the wheel and the wheels on the road aren't in alignment -- I'm going where I'm going and that's that.  Life on rails: not my fave; would not recommend.

:: So, how are you doing?  Feeling something similar, or worse?  I'm not even going into my emotional landscape -- no one wants to deal with that...

Alright.  Take good care of yourself.  Hopefully talk with you soon.


AI anatomy isn't always the most attractive, and I imagine having split feet must be hell on shoe purchases, but until I am practised enough with the actual medium, today's and tomorrow's proxies are the best I can give you.